Withdrawal

To sum up everything in the past month or so… I almost died.  So after a lot of drama, dying yet almost again; I had to go off of a very important medication that keeps me alive and switch to another.  So withdrawal is quite the literal bitch.  Hence my wide swinging mood swings.  So I’ve been going the highs and lows of life for the past week or so and with a medication that I’ve been taking for years god knows how long this pharmaceutical hell will last, but there’s good news.  Remember how I was yammering on about how I’m a big fan of “love at first sight”?  Well I had a weird dream a few weeks back.  To start of I have to say I’ve always thought life would be easier if we all knew who we were going to end up with.  I mean it would be the perfect motivation in life to keep the unhappy and unmotivated going, plus wouldn’t you want to know?  So I’m in the this ballroom (in a tux) and it’s one of those fancy parties.  There’s a dance floor and this woman who is in my dream my wife.  She’s slightly shorter than me, blonde, hazel eyes and very leggy.  She’s in this gorgeous black dress, and she’s mine.  We dance the night away.  The weird part is that now every time I hear the right song I flash back to that dream and dancing with her.  In the dream I’m so happy, and when the right music plays, I’m back there again… dancing.  I’m currently listening to the second song I’ve found that brings back her into my head, she's beautiful.  Sure it could be a hallucination from the withdrawal, but god wouldn’t it be cool if it wasn’t?